Senior Care Live 03.31.18.mp3

Senior Care Live
Sunday, April 1st

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Are you caring for an aging parents or are you searching for answers. Yeah senior care line of program dedicated. Providing information education and resource. Become the best caregiver you can beat. I'm your host Steve peca. Hello and welcome to senior care live I'm Steve Keiko president of senior care consulting. Thanks so much for being here today I really really appreciated. You are appreciated I promise you that when it's so much appreciate you you just EQ you can't you have no idea how much I appreciate you say is thank you for being here the mission here on the program senior care live is to provide information. Education and resources for seniors and their caregivers. We discuss many important subjects such as how to remain independent your own home would you consider moving from your home to a senior care community. How to find the right senior care community for your exact needs. How to pay for the high costs of senior care. We also review legal issues involving elder law and estate planning and we did discuss how to care for the caregiver we're gonna really get into that today. And drilled down on that very important subject so you may be listening to the radio right now streaming this on line or listening to a podcast after the fact. And no matter how you listen to this program again thanks so much for tuning in today and again you are very very much appreciated. If you need help with placement services for my firm senior care consulting. Or maybe you wanna learn more about services and products provided by one of our very knowledgeable guess you can always reach the summit toll free number it's 1800. 331. 6445. Again 1800. 3316445. Also don't forget to visit online through your website. What's a good stuff they're senior care lives L I VE senior care lions. Dot com and I'll tell you this is one of my favorite weekends. Ever. First of all are happy birthday to my triplet sons identical triplet boys. We were very sick for so we're really surprised. That they conduct no no history on either side. Via family tree there are no medicine at whatsoever just happened god does have a sense of humor as they say. But sixteen years ago Thursday. And it was on Good Friday when they were born. Ethan Logan and Noah. Were welcomed into this world and let me tell you while that was. That was the most intense I think the craziest time ever I love them to pieces I cannot imagine my life without my boys. And we're gonna get out today ends a bison new item baseball gloves and just do all kinds of fun stuff today. But I just wanna say happy birthday to my boys. And also wanted to say you know happy Easter weekend. I'll tell you what I cannot wait till tomorrow when our pastor says. He is risen and I cannot wait to enthusiastically. Declare. He is risen indeed so so happy Easter weekend to everyone's. All right so I'm gonna cover. The really important subject how. To care for the caregivers. Caregivers are notoriously. A selfless. They the caregivers I mean we we've put it all out there we don't take care ourselves it's all about the person that we love so much a bit much. Caregivers not talking to myself as well. Yeah you you got to take care we saw also today on an item off I'm gonna get through all this I'm a wealth of information to share with you if I don't get through everything. I will finish this up on another program by. I today all I'm gonna cover some ideas on how to maintain your stamina and energy for the caregivers of the elderly and explore options for changing. Energy depleting behaviors learn how to recharge ourselves and then how to engage in difficult conversations so that's a lot. Again to dump all talk cover all this today that I'm gonna cover a whole bunch of itself this I'll guarantee you this is a program you're probably gonna wanna listen to again. You'll definitely want to share with site any friends or family that you know who are caregivers and I EU may you don't wanna go back to listen to begin yourself so. Anyway first of all what is the flight attendant on the on the jet right here on the runway you get ready to fly you get right take off. What'd they always say before takeoff every single time what do they say. In case if turbulence or an emergency your oxygen masks will fall down from the cabin above view what do they always say. Put your mask on first. Before helping someone else with their mask. You have to take care of yourself. So that you can and take care of others. So let's ask the very let's ask the very primary question very fundamental. Are you a caregiver. I'll guarantee you I mean tens of thousands of people listening right now. Do not think your caregiver so let's just cover this do you do lawn work or snow removal or maybe some you know minor house repairs. For your parents or an elderly loved one. If you answered yes. You are the caregiver. Did you household chores cleaning laundry a few things like dad I'm for an elderly loved one yet your caregiver. You provide transportation to medical appointments and grocery shopping for an elderly loved one. You are a caregiver do you pay bills. I'm prepare meals is some things like champs that's part of being a caregiver but Steve I just chicken are my parents once awhile just to see if they're okay. And my caregiver. Yep you are congratulations. You are caregiver there are different levels. And engagement to being a caregiver from minimally engaged two hands on 24 hour care and everything in between. So in the vaguest idea if you are cured never. You are absolutely. Not alone and it depends on which survey you look at that the numbers that I like. At 66 million caregivers that makes up almost a third. The adult population and a third of the households in the United States of America. 49 million caregivers care for adults. Recipients thirteen million caregivers to care for both children and adult recipients so what do they call them. The sandwich generation answering your caring for for young kids or maybe. You know. Grade school junior high you're caring for your kids are not out of the nest yet. And here also caring for an elderly loved and usually when your parents or maybe even a grandparent or or an in law. Thirteen million sandwich generation. Four million caregivers. Care for children. And if you if you could. But I mean this you know and I'm gonna I'm an answer that would later I'm gonna mean to say that when that there's a teaser for the senior care life question of the week have got a little tease their. Anyway so I'm not gonna get into the employed caregivers too much I'll do that on another program. But one of the studies that I really really like to sing was comprehensive unfortunately it's about five years old so the numbers probably a little bit higher bit. They're saying that the average. You know it caregiver employed to cost your employer. 2110. Dollars a year. And the primary Costello consists of lost productivity being absent increased dose of health care issues of the employed caregiver there's there's a long list thereby. You're not in the bottom line is that if you're employed caregiver. Debts even may know there. Category that I wanna drill down on and really expand because it's becoming a major major issue an American business today. I soaked caregivers survival tips some of these do not go together by a lot of these free standing on their own. It's good to plan ahead whenever you possibly can't try to be as organized is possible. Learn about available resource is that it. Now the good news is there are a lot of resources out there the bad news is. There are a lot of resources out there so it's really hard that sometimes it's overwhelming there's so much information. Which one applies to you which one is accurate and that's why we're here with my from senior care consulting. And this program we can we cut right through didn't he give you the facts and only the facts. No fake news here on senior care libel guarantee that and then take it one day at a time. It if you try to plan too far ahead in this the situations is really stressful. Sometimes you do have to just take it one day at a time put one foot. In front of the other and take one step forward and then accept help. It in this end and hey guys I'm really really talk Indio. I'm talking to everyone but especially the men sometimes. We're resistant to help you I'm I'm Superman and I I got this I can take care this. Except help but to be Smart. So must help accept. Help make your health priority I'm probably gonna be beating on that drum for put quite a bit throughout the rest of the hour. Make your health a priority again you have to take care of yourself so that you can care for others. And and get enough rest eat properly make some time for yourself some some personal times you can recharge. I'd be good to yourself treat yourself. And then and then share how your feeling with other people it's really really not healthy to keep all of that bottled up inside. So those are just some quick tips in the wall drill down here a little bit become proactive. Prevent stress inducing opportunities. From happening so. I'll tell ya. I always. Believe. And playing offense. And that means being proactive. I would much rather see something coming and address it before it's even even an issue and that's just how I think and that's literally how I'm wired. So so one example keep your home safe from hazards fall risks fire prevention infection and injury. So ill and remove some carpets removed some of the throw rugs. So that so that you loved one if you've just instantly reduced the fall risking your home by about 50%. If the shuffling their feet they have a walker to just remove the throw rugs and you'd just really been proactive in fall. A prevention or may be reducing. The number of false fire prevention infection and injury there are so many things you can do to your home again. I could probably talk a whole program just on that one point. I'm trying to cover a lot of information to date be kind to yourself. To your back especially. Lift properly there are devices that can help transferred lift devices mobility equipment there's a lot of equipment. Don't be afraid to use some equipment to help you when your care giving needs after the break I will continue. The subject on how to care for the caregiver but first senior care live question of the week. Employed caregivers cost American business how much money per year. 810 billion V 22 billion C 34 billion Byrd. You're listening to senior care lies on the senior care broadcasting network. For more information call now toll free 1803316445. Operators are standing by 1803316445. I'll be right back. You listen to senior care lions. On the senior. Cure broadcasting network. For more information about services offered on this program how we can help you and your family. Call our toll free number at any time literally 24 hours a day this phone is open. It's answered by a real people how about that call 180331. 6445. Again 180331. 6445. The simply go to senior care live dot com click on the giant microphone of the listen live button you do a few seconds to connect and boom you're in they'll start streaming to your phone. Tablet your laptop your PC what every half and it really is that simple. Right back to the senior care live question of the week. Employed caregivers cost American business how much money per year. 810 debt ten billion dollars per year. Beat 22 billion dollars per year. C 34 billion dollars per year or dean. Fifty billion dollars per year in the answering this. CE 34. Billion dollars per year and again that's from. AM MetLife mature market institute. A study it is a few years all the numbers probably higher today but is such a great in thorough comprehensive study. I still quote does numbers although it's a little bit higher and the net today but I'm gonna stick with the 34 billion from the from this major major national nationwide. Comprehensive study. All right back to the topic of the day how to care for the caregiver caring for the caregiver. And we're talking that right now about becoming proactive. In gal like to play offense preventing stress inducing opportunities. From happening so we talked about it keeping your home safe from hazards fall risks fire prevention infection and injury. And then be kind to your back end and that's being kind to yourself that lift properly if you're not sure I'd be. There are you can. You get training from an occupational therapist the mail from home health company. You can then you can get training from a lot of different resources you can probably find that. A YouTube video on the Internet use transfer devices transfer boards. Lift devices. At mobility equipment there's a ton of equipment out there and if you're in do not strain your back because guess what if you're down. Your back is all out senior on muscle relaxer is in pain medications for the next months. Well who's gonna take care of your loved one. What are you gonna do. Is think about it. If you injure yourself. By not using some of the proper techniques. Or devices or equipment. Who's gonna take care of your loved one that's a good example. You've got to take care of yourself you got to be Smart about this. Become proactive prevent stress inducing opportunities from happened. A callus when the mealtime mess. So I use so I can't tell you how many people over the last fifteen and half years the cell tell you why. That meal time that's a super super Strasser. You know we won't do it's it's it's a mess. It's frustrating you spell and stuff all over the place is this is a mess so. I always suggest it and there are some special utensils with a really wide grip and a lot easier for someone with limited dexterity. To hold on to these utensils. They're just wonderful. There are plates that you can buy with that kind of it square and the lip if you will on the edge she can move the food to that little that little straight up lip. To kind of falls into the fourth with a spoon and then you can bring in up in Enid that that really helps with the mess there are adults. Basically stole spill proof cops. In monks like an adult like it's a teacup like we stand with our kids but for adults. And very appropriate and that really helps. With you know actually. Bumping a glass of milk or juice or water tear copy and having that fall over. So that that really really helps learning an advance. In advance how to re direct. They loved one with alzheimer's or dementia. I've read direction is just simply. It just kind of taking their focus our first off of AB shaking the door of the doorknob warning. When he didn't get out and leave. And maybe it's zero. Out or hundred degrees out maybe that's not a good idea distract illnesses some positive distraction. Hey guess what we just makes him delicious chocolate chip cookies it's your favorite this program point. OK now I just it's a distraction kind of the technique that you have to learn. How to do that and don't wait until you're in the crisis moment to figure out who I'm I need to do to learn how to do it before you needed again this is part of being proactive. Develop a network of family and friend caregivers the majority of care is provided free of charge. Through family and friends caregivers. And so I developed a network of of of these people who are willing to help out and remember except. Help. Except helped do it you'll be glad you did. And then fix it if it isn't broken evaluate what you have what you're doing. That that is is working. And then figure out what is not working and then focus on what is not working and trying to improve. Those areas so it's it's working well leave it alone. Set some goals and established routines. To meet your loved ones needs I think a routine. And in kind of a schedule and a rhythm of the day I think that's good for all. Parties and then have family conferences. Talk about outside in just just talk about indeed just brutally honest and and and get some feelings out and guess what sometimes. That may. There may be a little bit uncomfortable but they can get this stuff out and talk about to step. Have family conferences. You'll be in just communication this is such a key test almost everything in our life. I'm so so have the family conferences and really talk can be honest and open planned activities and get friends and family involved. And then if help is needed and you have people who do wanna help you let them help you but don't just say. The out come on over some time and then I just being very specific be like a manager you know we really need help with a laundry would you mind helping that was some laundry today. You've got to you know learn towels and let alone if you know dark clothes or whites say whatever you're you're you're washing their particular date can can you help out with him maybe help Ellison Betty to maybe change the bed linens today. And dumb. Or maybe Al Pacino mop the floor to be very specific people want to help and they would love to jump in and accomplishing tasks can feel like. Since soc. Out of fulfillment knowing that they just did a great job been in any really helped yummy they did a great job with whatever it is you ask them. Not to do. All right and then. Changing energy deeply teen behaviors. This is huge. This is really really really big. There's so many things. It behaviors. That and then you have that you actually you may not realize it be actually have control over. So recognize that realize it. This say okay where am I need to think about this. You know trying to take on too much why is there any way that I can you maybe take on a little bit less I just know your limits. And acknowledge your limits yeah and that might just be saying no maybe you're someone who just always says yes and tries to help. Well guess what maybe now you need to kind of pull back and say look it's. It's me in my dad's B in my mom I'm not going to be able to work late for awhile. Just say no to voluntary. You can volunteer later right now. And he used to do it. You can volunteer in the future right now your focus is somewhere else it's just say no to organizing the next neighborhood bar BQ. Know your limits acknowledged them and it's OK to say no. And and again I'll continue with. A lot more information about how to change energy he eating behaviors we're talking about caring. For the caregiver I'll have a whole lot more right after the break. You're listening to senior care life on the senior care broadcasting network. For more information call now toll free 1803316445. Operators are standing by 1803316445. I'll be right back. Welcome back. You're listening to senior care lives on the senior care broadcasting network for more information about the services offered on this program. And how we can help you and your family cholera toll free number at any time 1803316445. Again. 180331. 6445. Don't forget if you ever miss an episode a senior Carol I have maybe you wanna. And I'll do it again I compared Tia a lot of people listening you're there wanna share this program. With someone else who needs to hear this may be really helpful for them. And maybe just wanna go back in here at the information again. No worries at all to give us a couple of days to get the program up on the website go to senior care live dot com. Click on the podcast tablet. In the you can go to the year the month in the exact date. You'll have everything listed in chronological order from the most recent and then moving back you can find the topic they'll be out like a short. Paragraph on what is covered on net and feel free to do that in the game need you I mean. Hundreds and hundreds of people that listen to that every single week actually. I so I just feel treated do you got a year and again you can do that in the middle and I feel like tip so feel free help yourself. By talking about caring for that care giver. In the area that I was yen before the break changing energy depleting behavior so so here's one if you don't ask for help. That is an energy depleting behavior. Ask for help. Seriously. There's no shame in that. You are doing a good job there's nothing to be embarrassed by. There's there's there should be no guilt. Do not let your pride get in the way ask for. Help I cannot emphasize that enough. There are a lot of people who probably wanna help you right now you need to let them help you. Get temporary or short term help. From respite care. We talked to ban on net and talked up there on the program. With rich shepherding golden part senior care I do in fact I just spoke with a couple about a week ago and they need this exactly mini respite care. The caring for their. Mother who is in her nineties. Mean you break. Rick in golden her senior care gonna come in for a couple weeks and just really give them of a big break and they're gonna go on an anniversary trip who's going to be a great thing they're gonna come back totally. Recharge so reach out. For a temporary or short term help with respite care. And and in you will that all have trust me they'll help you change that energy depleting behavior for sure. All right empower yourself with information and know what they say you know information. Is is so it is knowledge in an information this power I was say empower yourself with information and knowledge seek out resources. Again there are a lot of resources available maybe too much but you know again you can always reach out to senior care consulting. I check out senior care consulting dot com senior care live dot com if you listen this program we already do a good job of that learning. About information education resources and they're just so many resources available. You know that from right here where there radio station is is your Johnson County area agency on aging. Her maybe the why not county area agency on TV aging there's some other triple a.'s in our area. On the Missouri side mark mid America regional council tremendous. Depot of resource as I mean tremendous resource its. So a lot of resources that you can reach out and Indian empower yourself with information. Become knowledgeable. All right maintain and recharge. Your Stam and and your energy this is huge your physical health. Will start in on net just being a caregivers is such. Such hard work especially if you're providing hands on. Care we have to take care we all I'm talking to myself here too we all have to take care of our bodies and our mine several we're talking about physical here first. So that we can. That provide the best care possible for our elderly loved ones who. Totally depend on us. So get a check up again this is take care of you sell your mask on first. Don't. Don't just blow off all of your doctor's appointment and I know you donate. And I am yeah I'm talking to you. I'm talking to you. Yet your checkup. Noted that dentists get your eyes checked. Take care of your physical. Health. The best care is provided when you are in optimal condition. So. Take care that get up and get your check up. Find a way to get that done. Exercise. Exercise Steve are you kidding me I am so completely exhausted we talk about exercise. Okay well it's a proven fact physical exercise produces endorphins. Released muscle tension. I do it can be as simple as just going for a walk down the street and some fresh air. You will be stunned. How old how much better you feel even if you're dead dog tired. How much better you'll feel if you just go for a walk around the block. Down the streets. To the end of the blockage of the stops I just walked back. Reason some fresh air. You'll be stunned how much that will help you even if you're dead dog tired. Indian gate here arrest Steve what are you talking about getting rest this time for rest I'm constantly. 24 hours a day doing something that you have to figure out. You you you have to do your best. To sleep well at night have summoned the in really view but you have to you have to figure this out you have to get some sleep maybe work in a couple of power naps. During the day while vacuum that's a that's a huge. A huge recharge of the battery and make it gives him energy and stamina back comfort to treat yourself. To your favorite suitor beverage era. Cup of cocoa aura or whatever whatever your thing yes. It is just amazing. How much the beverage you're just a favorite snack or meal can't comfort in Susan just help you. Feel so much better get a massage. Did this was huge in just instantly relieves all the attention. Reduces all of your stress many of us including me big time I hold my stress and attention in my. Next in my shoulders. He CE can you can go out for thirty minute or sixty minute massage. And it doesn't have to be their formal maybe have a friend or relative just give your background and neck massage. And I'll tell you why is it may sound a little bit it'll have a big positive impact for you. Express your motions. I I'm big on this I I'm a drummer. I had no idea. When I was a kid I didn't realize this. He you know when your high school kid in your full of hormones right we have teenage angst about right and all that stuff and it and a lot of my friends are people I knew of they would go out in. And done. No maybe drink beer or do other things that you're not supposed to do in year out of high school teenage kid. That may be drive their cars and 120 miles narron and getting in trouble etc. guess what I did and I didn't appreciate the benefits and I said in my room. And I would just beat the crap out of my drums are we just rock out I would just pound my drums for like an hour an hour and a half and just get that out. And then. I was good to go. I had no idea. That probably saved you from maybe getting in trouble. I didn't know that until years later when I actually kind of realize that but so it's perhaps some kind of an outlet a punching bag. Do some exercise for fighting pride of place. And literally just scoring just can't. Get all that outs. Don't be afraid to let the tears flow either. Sometimes if she had a good cry just gift that just purge that out your system or just give all you feel just a lot better if you can do that. I'm mental health using your mind in a positive way I've always been in forever will be my glass is always. Always and forever half full always. In May be way more than half full. But just if you think positively some people say all that's just a bunch of do nonsense that is just silly. Those Tony Robbins. You know row ross' sessions all known and unknown. Think positively. And it will have a direct impact about how you feel about your situation. Men because different behaviors trust me it is a worthwhile effort to use your mind and a positive. Way this is part of taking care of yourself. Then if you have kind of like a battle cry or opera slogan or or Ernie out. A motto if you will. I know this is in caring for elderly loved ones but when we brought our triplets home. Wow. That was hard just no way to prepare for that. In so. Our battle cry is one day at a time Sunday's it was one hour at a time. And we made it. We made it through but you know what is your. Mantra what is your slogan. Then keep a journal I'm. I'm not really big and I do write some things down a lot of people write a lot of stuff down but this is this really it's just it's really a great thing to do. In just I just just write a list of things that you need to remember. How to express how you feel in your journal and they'll again this is all part of just kind of just kidding stuff out and it does help you. At Rio recharge into. Reenergize. I plan your day again it just just be as organized it's possible that really helps have your schedule but also don't be afraid to be flexible and just kind of make you Alter that schedule if possible but they again this is super super important to do that just become very organized. I don't watch all over the house trying to find all of your bills and everything take all of your mail and put it in one spot. And that way you don't spend half an hour looking for something and again we're trying to maintain current and recharge or stamina and in our energy here. I keep everything in one drawer 11 place. It just again this just all part of being organized hate your legal affairs in order now this can be a difficult process that just having your legal affairs in order provides tremendous. Peace of mind and I would strongly recommend doing that's and then there's your emotional health. You know and this allows you to be feel fulfilled in field joy even in the most difficult. Of times. We can find joy. We can be. Fulfilled. And we can't have. Satisfying moments. Trust me. I've been a caregiver for my dad who's terminally ill it was bad. But even in the most difficult times we found joy. You can do it too I'm gonna come back with even more right after the break. You're listening to senior care life on the senior care broadcasting network. For more information call now pull free 1803316445. Operators are standing by 1803316445. I'll be right back. Welcome back. You're listening to senior care lives on the senior care broadcasting network. For more information about the services offered on this program how we can help you and your family color toll free number at any time 1800. 3316445. Again 180331. 6445. We're back to caring for the caregiver there so many things. So many pieces and I'm really flying through this pretty quickly so I do I promise I will come back. And I'll start to break a lot of the stale I think I have some guests that I would love to have on the program as well. Who are are just really really experts in this in this area but I do love to cover this so important. Right now we're talking about maintaining. In recharging your stamina in your energy were focused on emotional health now. And you know sometimes maybe just need to call a timeout it's been ten or fifteen minutes away from the situation. The smell of fresh air just. Enjoy some of the simple pleasures in life just watched that the birds flying around that this could be something that simple just call. A timeout you get away even if it's just for a few minutes. It will really help positive reinforcement. I just acknowledge in a way in what you've done well take pride in the great work that you're doing. I just feel good about about being a caregiver. Back into sync the options I mean if you weren't there are caring for them where would they be right now and then acknowledge that as a job well done. Enjoying music I would turn to music my wife would turn to a book she loves love reading I've never seen anyone read more than she does. My dad is her kind of per outlet I would turn to music I would play music I would listen to music some people may not paint or draw org piceance. It could just turn to some sort of the creative outlet that really really helps. I he'll take a walk down memory lane look at some of that some of your accomplishments and duck in just marvel in the job well done and just say you know what maybe it's simple as you look at. Pictures if you kids and you look at them and their families who like to know what. We really do a good job there which we just weeks. We did it we did a good job and that's and and again and that's part of kind of pat yourself on the back can give yourself some credit just feeling good about yourself. If you have a hobby again. I've turned to that in just dive into that. It's really really helpful. I you don't have have a good laugh again I've been to presentations on laugh therapy in people may laugh about that ironically at. But it's really it's it's true it helps so much it's and the believable if you're laughing you cannot be a bad mood in last all right so there's really something to that. And then end and find something you're you're proud of real live accomplishments. In dumb. It in in just again. Marmol in in the job well done and then there's your spiritual health you'll find strength through your faith really lean on. On those that your church speak with your passer. Engage with other people in your church who may be in similar position as secured of a caregiver. It just refill your spiritual tank. They attend church services if it all possible. If that's important he is not important every wondered if it's important to you. Find a way to get to church seriously and and in May be have the church come to you. Refill your spiritual tank. Then there's the difficult conversation there was a 2014 national study that asked children. What conversation with your elderly parents would you most want to avoid some number three was. Anything related to sex and I'm like Israel now and and it I'm surprised that's not number wind does number three number two. The most. Difficult conversation or that conversation with one will avoid at the end of life plans that's a tough conversation. A bit number one. They sit taking the car keys away I'm kind of surprised that was number one the debt that Owens just brutal. So having a difficult conversation. Look we just need doing knowledge trained to do get sick they weren't where absolutely. Ill prepared to sit to have that role reversal. Where may be worth the responsible ones maybe were talking about tough love were like wait a minute there's these are my parents did change my diapers and all I can do this. Right just acknowledged that it is tough. To discuss the issue of whenever that the issue is that you need to talk about. And Lotta times were in denial. Oh it's fine it will just put it off to next week and next week never comes you put up to next month next year and all the sudden. UC LU has been in the sea and you've been avoiding it now you're really really wish you never would have done that. There are concerns about privacy issues may be your parents to wanna tell you about. Your financial concerns or after having incontinence issues neither really embarrassed about that to privacy issues wow this just part of what makes this really really tough. You know who we may have a lack of knowledge about the issue. And that that needs to be discussed that maybe just needs to be brought up in the may be need to consult a professional about whatever their particular issue is. Remember the consequences of not having the conversation many times. That's way worse than having the conversation. And in our minds this is a human nature thing we're gonna build up. The worst case scenario the worst case outcome and it jazz gonna storm out hill hate me forever and I'll never see in my parents again because you'd be so mad. Well guess what. It is highly probable that they have some of the same concerns. That you do. And it just it just sick about this. The think about the gains. The positives that come from this not the negatives. You get your ducks in a row they probably. Have the same. Concerns but just be prepared for your conversation. Picked the right time to approach this speak with them. Speech speak to them with dignity and love and respect these are your parents. Right and I think most people do that and just be candid. Use humor to be honest. I don't know how to say this but I'm just gonna jump in and just be this can jump in data KN yeah okay go ahead and I'm Tanya. 95%. Of the time may be every single time you you'll probably be surprised. This is gonna go a little bit better than you expected in your mind because we always go to their worst case scenario and you're you might be you'll probably be pleasantly surprised. While that win a lot better than I really thought it ever was going to. Going to go. So as a recap acknowledge. That you are a caregiver even if he even if you're helping your loved one minimally you you are curator acknowledged that take care of yourself. And don't be afraid to ask for help. Empower yourself with knowledge. And information. This so helpful. Seek out resources. That can help you there are tons and tons of resources available. Seek them out it'll really really help changer energy depleting behaviors. Recharge and maintain your stamina in your energy. And engage. In the difficult conversations. You've built it up into your mind that this is gonna be horrible. And you'll probably be stunned. At how well it goes. You probably be surprised that it wasn't as bet and you know what that might be bad might be best for minute and then. Everyone cools off the comeback you know you're right. You write a cushion to send those things son of the you're right I. I do I have been kind of high in some things from Europe and now I'm ready to talk about so maybe it's icebreaker but usually ends up far better than he ever thought. It would if you would just engage in those difficult conversations. So I hope you receive this information. As a message of hope and love and trying out some of these ideas and I think you'll see you know proven in your life. He ends. In the life of your elderly loved ones. All right so sorry had to cook food that's so fast. I will in the future break down some of these with a lot of examples and further explanation but it just really been one to cover. That how to cure for the caregiver in the main messages take care of yourself so that you can take care of others. And again when he acknowledged that this is Easter weekend I just can't wait until tomorrow where I can say hallelujah. He is risen he is risen. India hope you have a blessed. He Easter weekend. I'm your host Steve kicker and I wish you grace and peace. May god bless you and your family on this date and always. We'll see you next week right here on senior care life.